THE BART CAPER

The BART Caper

 The BART is the subway in San Francisco, California.  It travels to Millbrae in the South of the Peninsula; across the bay to Oakland, south to Fremont in the East Bay and north all the way to Concord. 

There are many BART stations around the Downtown area of San Francisco.  

I have mentioned in some of my stories about traveling from Florida to California in the early part of 1975.  For you new comers to my Blog this was my family's first time in San Francisco, so we were getting to know the city and while I was just a young thirteen year old girl and my family was poor and living on Welfare at the time; the only way to get cash money to ride the bus or train or the BART we had to look for change lost on the streets.

Welfare paid for the rent and electric but nothing more.  Food and only food was bought with food coupons.  Back in the Seventies food coupons came in a booklet like a ticket book and each coupon had a dollar amount such as a one, a five a ten or twenty.  Anything that was taxable could not be purchased.  Soda, beer, laundry detergent, all taxable.  we could only buy edible non-taxable food.

My brother, Doug liked to con people to get money and he was trying to teach me his trade.  I was a good girl and I was not going to do bad things and get into trouble because I knew better.

We hadn't been in San Francisco long and we walked everywhere.  We didn't have a telephone.  Everywhere we moved to we never had a telephone.

Doug and I hung out together for no other reason than company.

Doug was fearless and when we went places together he had ideas about finding ways to get money. 

One idea was to beg adults for change for the telephone so that he could call our mother to come and pick us up.  Another thing our mother didn't have was a car. Nor did she know how to drive.

Doug was fifteen and always expected me to follow his lead. 

One day we walked down to the BART station together.  Doug wanted me to try begging for a dime for the telephone.  I said, "No I can't do that.  It's wrong.  It's a lie."  We needed money but one dime was nothing. He said keep asking a lot of people and most of them will give you money out of pity.

I stood far back away just far enough to watch him in play.  H asked women for a dime to call his mother to come pick him up.  Each time he got a dime he would go over to the pay telephone to pretend to make the call.  When the woman was out of sight he put the dime in his pocket; then he would keep asking other people for money for a few more times and this was a way he was becoming a con man. 

I tried it once and was afraid and felt guilty. It worked but I didn't do it again.  I did not ask for money anymore, but one day when I was alone at the BART station I did something more daring than begging.

I knew there were lockers at the bus stations that people used to store some of their belongings in.  They used quarters to put into the coin slot to pay to get the key to use later to retrieve their belongings.

Since I knew about the lockers in the bus station I decided to head to the BART to the lockers there to possibly find a quarter of two because sometimes they get stuck in the coin slots.

This I decided to try without Doug.  I was very hesitant and really felt I would get caught and I needed to be seriously careful and watch my back. I already learned long ago how to be extra sneaky quiet and not seen from my experience in my earlier years of my childhood. (Thanks to my evil mother.) 

I spotted the lockers and slowly began checking the slots for loose , stuck or dangling quarters.  I made sure to glance around to see if anyone was coming or watching me.  

I was bending down close to the floor when I spotted a quarter that I thought I had a chance of getting out.  I had already retrieved one quarter from another locker and I almost had the second one when a sneaky man caught me off guard and yelled, "What do you think you're doing little girl?" 

As I turned around, I saw that he was a very large Security Guard.

I thought to myself, "Oh no! I'm in trouble and I had to get out of it fast."

"I'm trying to get my quarter out. It got stuck.", I said.  He said, " It looks like you were stealing it because I've been standing behind you watching you grabbing at it for a few minutes now."  I said, "No! it is my quarter and it got stuck."  

He tried to grab me and take me to the Security Guard counter.  I thought to myself; I have to get away, get out of this fast.  No Juvie for me.

He asked me my name.  I told him Sally Smith right off the top of my head.  He asked me where I lived. I said I don't know.  He asked me what's my phone number.  I said we don't have a phone.

As he turned his back on me to talk to the other Security Guard, I eyed the exit to the street which was directly in front of me and up the stairs.  

He was immersed in conversation with the other man so I took off running like hell and made a beehive for the door; dashed up the stairs and hit the streets running my little butt off down Powell street and disappeared onto the nearest bus home.  

No, I did not pay.  It was easy to hop onto any bus in San Francisco at that time by way of the back door and nobody could stop me because it was so overcrowded that the bus driver never had a clue.

The Security Guard never saw me again and I never did it again.

I never told anybody in my family at that time or to my husband or children. 

That was my first and last Caper told now in this Blog.

 

TO WET OR NOT TO WET

TO WET OR NOT TO WET

  It was the second home we rented when we moved from New York to Florida.

 We were trying to settle in a new home in Wanetta and I was only four years old going on five.  I had two brothers.  One was two years older and the other was a year younger.  I had seen my mother's boyfriend who I called Daddy wetting his hair when he combed it.  I didn't know why men wet their hair in the first place to comb it.  I didn't think about it or care. 

       

        One morning I was going into the bathroom and I saw my two brothers standing in front of the sink wetting their hair and combing it just as a grownup would do.  I asked them why they were wetting their hair and they said because we are boys and that's how we comb our hair.   I could not understand this action at all.  So I went to the sink and wet my hair too and began to comb it.   They said you can't do that you're a girl.   I argued with that fact.  I asked them what why can't I wet my hair and you can?  "You just can't.", they said.

I complained and answered by telling them that when I take a shower my hair is wet and then I comb it.  They still said it isn't the same thing.  You can't wet your hair like us and comb it because we are boys and that is what boys do.  I still came back with that doesn't make any sense if my hair is wet after a shower or if I wet it at the sink to get it combed.

They wanted to keep arguing with me about it but I stood my ground and I knew even at my age I had a valid point and I told them their explanation was stupid.  Well, I could not actually use those words because I didn't have such a vocabulary yet.  I did, however get them to think about what I said.  I knew that I made sense and they had to process my logic. 

I didn't let them get me down and they never stopped me from wetting my hair at the sink again, but I didn't do it unless I felt it was necessary.

I learned later in life that logic goes a long way when other people try to beat it and can't.

I wet because I proved to them that I could.  (A four year old with brilliant thoughts.)

 

 

          

   

FLINTSTONES vs. YMCA

 FLINTSTONES vs. YMCA 

We had made the big move all the way across the country from Florida to San Francisco, California.  There were the six of us including our mother.  My oldest sister, Jane was married and left the family by the time she was 18.

Our mother picked San Francisco to move to in hopes of marrying her new boyfriend she met through the Personal Ads in the newspaper.  That was a long distance relationship and the way some people met in those days. (Unlike the Internet of today's world.)

There were five of us siblings traveling by Greyhound bus for four days with our mother.

There was Elaine, Doug, Daniel, Timmy and myself.

Upon our first arrival in San Francisco we were all awestruck at the sights and newness of everything we had never experienced before.  Our mother grew up in New York, so she was used to a big city.  We came from a small town and a big city was overwhelming to us children.

We needed somewhere to stay and as soon as we left Florida we were homeless.

Back in 1975 I was a young teenager, so I was wanting to play and watch TV; especially cartoons.

At the bus station they had a small office called the Traveler's Aide Society.  My mother had heard of this organization so she inquired about possible assistance they may be able to provide.

They suggested we try the Catholic church and the Nuns might allow us to stay there a few days.

After a tiring, tedious, long walk up and down many hills and blocks we finally found the church.  We were allowed to stay only three days and we had to be out of there from 6 AM to 6 PM each day.  That meant we roamed the streets all day finding places to sit and eat if we could find anything at all because we didn't have money.

After staying the three days we were on the move again.

This time we ended up at the YMCA.  I couldn't imagine the six of us staying there with all of those men.

None of us were happy about it and we were mad at Mommy for bringing us there.  I was extremely angry about everything.

We had no idea how long we would be there. 

While we stayed at the YMCA we found the basement where there was only one TV and rows of chairs for anyone to sit on.

My siblings and I had to go to school so Mommy, somehow managed to enroll us in schools  according to our various ages and grades. 

I was in the Seventh Grade and had to take the city bus to school for the first time ever and I was very afraid of riding with all of the strange people and the crowdedness because I often got bumped into and my feet stepped on.

We got back to the YMCA just in time for The Flintstones to come on TV at four o'clock in the afternoon. 

Doug, Elaine, Daniel and I ran downstairs to the basement to watch TV.  I was not happy when we arrived and found the room full of ugly, old men.  To me all men were old and most of them looked ugly. Many of them were already sitting and watching the news.  (In today's world...OMG!)

The Flintstones were coming on and I wanted to watch The Flintstones.  I stood up to walk to the TV to change the channel.  Before I could move, Doug stopped me and told me to sit down.

He said, "Heather, there are other people in this room and you can't change the channel just because you want to."

That was only the first day so I let them watch the news.  I left the room and went back upstairs to Mommy to complain to her about it.

I'm not quite sure how long we stayed there. 

Every day that we were there we all went down to the basement to watch TV.  Mommy even joined us sometimes.  Timmy didn't go to school yet so she took care of him all day.

I was getting very upset about not being able to watch The Flintstones at all.  One day I snapped!

We went to the basement as usual and of course all the men were watching the news. (Again, in today's times , this is bullshit!)

I wasn't going to let them have their way.  I told Doug, "I'm going up there and changing the channel." "I'm not going to let anyone stop me."

Doug told me to "Shut up, and sit down!  You can't make them change the channel just for you."

I went to the TV.  I changed the channel and a man changed it back.  I changed it again and he changed it back.  This went on for a while.

I yelled, " I want to watch The Flintstones and I am not letting anybody watch the news.  I have a right to watch The Flintstones and you can't stop me!"

Doug tried to get me to sit down.  "Sit down Heather!", he yelled at me over and over again and again.  "I won't sit down.  I'm watching The Flintstones.  It's my turn.", I kept yelling back at him.

The man groaned and gave up and allowed me to change the channel.  Most of the other men were angry; left the room and wanted me to leave.

I was yelling at them all with great determination.  I was going to get my way.  They could all shut up!

In the end, I won and so did The Flintstones.

RUNNING AWAY FROM HOME WITH PERMISSION

 Running Away From Home With Permission

The sprinklers were on in the park across the street from our house in Winter Haven.  It was Summer and hot.

It was time to run and play and splash in the sprinklers.

Mommy was in the house as usual.  She stayed indoors most of the time and watched Timmy and TV at the same time.  Daniel, Elaine and Janet were home doing other things.

David and I hung out together most of the time since we got along the best.

On this day we both decided to go play in the sprinklers and later ask Elaine and Daniel to play with us.

We were barefoot already so we didn't worry about shoes.  I threw on my little red swimsuit. It was the only one I had and a hand-me -down from Elaine.  It was loose on me in some places but it had to do.

David threw on some shorts and we headed outside to run around in the hot sun and get wet.

We did not know what was going on at home and we did not care.  I was nine and David was 11.  He was old enough to know when we should head back in the house.  I suppose it was getting dark and we started to get cold.

Fun in my family didn't last long.  Disappointments came often and as children our age we should not have so many disappointments.

Little did we know that as soon as we entered the house, Mommy was already angry about something.  It seemed like anything set her off.  So whatever she was angry about she blamed on one of us or all of us. We could be totally innocent of everything and still get blamed for whatever it was.

She was yelling and screaming and we were nervous and scared and upset the minute we walked in the door.

Mommy obviously, had to say something to both of us to make us want to run away from home.  Whatever happened while we were outside playing must have been so bad that she would not stop screaming at us.  I think she just did not like us having fun and she chose to be in the house because she would never let Timmy grow up and she treated him like an infant even when he was at least four years and could walk and talk and do a lot of things.

She still had him in diapers and wouldn't toilet train him.   She would not let any of us get close to him or help him do anything or play with him at all.

She threatened us with beatings if we even tried to go near him.

This thing about her I believe triggered her anger towards us in a way that we thought she was crazy or just plain jealous.

Anyway, here we were standing in front of her listening to her yelling at us so we decided to test her and told her we are going to run away from home to try to find another family who would take us in to their home and adopt us as their children. 

We dared her and asked, "Can we run away from home and you promise not to come looking for us or call the police?"  She said , "Okay, go ahead.  Run away and don't come back.  I won't look for you or call the police.  Just go and don't ever come back."

We held her to her promise and were really going to leave.

To my surprise, Daniel was running away with us since it was him she was yelling at when we came into the house.

I was still only wearing the red swimsuit so David let me put on a pair of his sweat pants.  He put on a pair of pants and we hurriedly ran out the door before she could come after us.

I didn't want to go but I had my mind set on what she said and our lives with her were not good.  What else could we do right then and there?  I had to be strong and stay with David.  Daniel was scared but he wanted to try to go with us and not cry.

It was do or die.  We walked out the front door and didn't say goodbye.  Daniel wanted to go to Buckeye Hills.  A neighborhood about 2 miles away that was a rich area so he may have thought if he got to a house there the people would be nice and kind and help him.

I told him not to split us up and he started to walk in that direction alone.

David and I hoped that Mommy would keep her word and not follow us.  We walked to the corner of the block and turned left with no direction in mind.  Just walk and keep walking.

I asked David, "Where are we going?" He wanted to try to get to Rotary Park and keep walking towards Lake Martha to find a house to ask the people there to help us and let us stay the night.

We didn't have friends to stay with or help us.  Running away was simply running away.  We didn't plan this or really want this to happen.  She pushed us too far and we couldn't take it anymore.

As we started around the corner we ended up in Sixth Street which was actually the street that was in the back of our house.  When we took a short cut through our back yard and went through the bushes we ended up on Sixth Street.

We were walking down Sixth Street back towards the back of our house and suddenly we heard someone calling our names.  I told David that's Mommy calling us.  She's was calling in her loud voice, "Heather! David!, I know you're here.  I saw you come this way."

So much for her promise.  "David, she's coming, she's coming!  Let's hide in the bushes." I cried.  

David always had something up his sleeve.  He said, "Let's go to Rotary Park.  She won't find us there."

I was scared , she was coming closer and she had Timmy in the stroller.  She would never let him walk and it was super embarrassing to us when she treated him like this. 

we had to keep moving so we decided to run really fast out of the bushes and down around the corner back to Fairfax Street.

When we finally got back to Fairfax Street we took off to Rotary Park.  I didn't know how far it was but at least we were far from where Mommy was looing for us.

We could still hear her calling our names and she was approached by someone walking down the street and they probably asked her what was wrong.  We knew that she couldn't call the police because she was outside walking and we did not have a telephone in our house.  She would have had to go back home and go next door to the neighbor's house to call them.

We got to the park and I kept telling David not to stop there.  He insisted he wanted to stop and watch some people playing Frisbee.

We were just two little kids.  We were not there to play Frisbee and we could not play with adults.

He wanted to prove me wrong so he went over to the guys playing and got them to let him play.  I was tired and upset and we needed to go. I begged and pleaded with him to get going that minute.

Too late!  I saw a police car coming our way and it was driving directly on the grass.  They were coming for us.  We were doomed.

She promised and didn't keep it. She called the police.

We tried to run. We couldn't run fast enough.

They caught us and put us in the car and started to take us home.  

We were both crying and scared.  The police asked us we were and what we were doing out in the park.

We wanted them to believe us when we told them the truth.  "She told us we could run away. She gave us permission.  She will beat us really badly when we get home." We begged them not to take us home. "She is going to kill us and beat us black and blue.", we cried out to them.

They did not know her and did not know what she would do and did not believe a word we said. 

She was waiting for us at the door and politely thanked the policemen for bring her loving children home to her.  They did the same and told us to be good and not ever do it again.

We later learned that Daniel went home crying as soon as he got to the corner by the water department.  She beat him and sent him to bed.

When we asked her why she followed us and how the police knew where to find us , she lied and said they just happened to be driving by when they heard her calling our names.

Actually she went home and had Janet call the police from the neighbor's house.

She did beat us black and blue and we hated her and always wanted to run away again and again, but always afraid to do it.

Never ask permission to run away from home.   It is not worth it.

The End 

Written by:  Heather Pasaphunthu

 

 

 

ACCIDENTALLY PLAYED HOOKY

 Accidentally Played Hooky

Orange groves were the highest population of fruit grown in Florida.

One could say it was a staple in abundance at the time we lived in Winter Haven.

My mother's boyfriend was still living with us by the time I was 8 years old.  He had connections with people who needed help in the orange groves. Sometimes , he was asked to help pick oranges in the nearby towns when the harvesting season came and help was scarce.

We were a large family so "daddy" need us to help pick the oranges in Lakeland.

It was a school day and early in the morning.   Mommy gave us a choice between going to school and picking oranges.  

My brother, David, and I chose to stay home an go to school on our own.  I felt something was going to happen if we did not hurry up and start walking to school as soon as the others left for their trip to the orange grove. 

I said to David, " If we don't leave now, we will be late." I did not want to be late or get into trouble if Mommy found out that we were late.

He tried to assure me that we could make it if we walked very fast.  I didn't know how to get to school without him.  He knew the way there. 

I noticed the time and we were already late, it was almost 9 o'clock in the morning as we headed down the road towards the college.  At that time it was the Winter Haven Jr College.  

The name had been changed to Polk Community College since we moved away from there in 1973.

I hoped David would keep walking and get us to school even though we were already late.

He was tired and said we should go home and forget it.  I said, "You know that Mommy will come home to catch us there; she always does.  You know she is very sneaky and finds out everything we do."  

Mommy didn't drive and David thought she would not find out because "daddy" was driving and he was in charge of when they came home.  

I  was sure she would come walking in the front door any time now and it was going on eleven o'clock.

David wanted to eat something so he headed to the kitchen.  We both got out the bread , jelly and peanut butter and made peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. I happened to be a clean person since it had been thrown my way since I was able to walk.

I warned David that we should hurry up and clean up everything and put it all away because I was sure Mommy would walk in the door any time and catch us home and eating the sandwiches.

I should have put everything away by myself , but I didn't bother to either.   

"She's coming!", I gasped.  I heard the door opening and David and I ran out the back door and hid in the bushes.

I knew she would see the mess we left on the table and know that we were home.

We were in big trouble and Mommy was going to beat us with a belt or a tree branch for playing hooky.

Mommy was in control of the family because she was very forceful and made everybody afraid of her including "daddy".

I was very scared and I started to cry.  David was scared too and knew we were both gonna get it.  "I told you she would catch us." , I said to David.  " I told you not to leave anything out, but you didn't listen to me." 

She yelled at us and beat us black and blue.   She said we were supposed to go to school and didn't go.  We tried to explain that it was getting too late to go to school and we went home instead.  She was even madder that we could have gone to pick oranges and not be in trouble.   That was a lie because she gets mad no matter what we do.

We feared for our lives because she was so cruel.   

We did not mean to accidentally play hooky.

 

  

 

MY TREE

I grew up in the small town of Winter Haven Florida.  It is located in central Florida and famous for Cypress Gardens and The Land of Lakes.

Our little house was located down the street from the local Junior College and across the street from a baseball park which had four baseball diamonds.  The park was not fenced in and we went there to play everyday.

My brothers and sisters and I often walked across the street to play baseball of frisbee or sometimes ran in the sprinklers in our bathing suits in the Summer.

Mommy sent us outside to play so that she didn't have to put up with us and sometimes I stayed close by just to be able to hear her call me or one of the other children.  More often than not, she wanted us to do something.  You could call it stressed out when it came to me because she often called me the most for some kind of chore and it was usually washing the dishes.

I was the youngest girl of the six children and the most reliable.  I knew better than to be out of earshot from her yell when she yelled for me.  It was yelling more than calling. 

If she didn't yell for me herself, she would send my sister outside to yell for me.  She always yelled, "Heather!, Mommy wants you!"  I yelled back, "What does she want me to do now?"  She answered, "She wants you to wash the dishes."  Of course she does.  I knew neither of my sisters would do it even they they were much older and I had to stand on a chair to be able to reach the sink.

So, I made sure I stayed as close to the corner of the park as possible.

I found a little tree not far from the corner and I would lay under it daydreaming of leaving home and never seeing my family again.  As I lay there, I would pull the grass out of the ground and watch the ants walk up and down the tree.  I was careful to look for red ants because they bite the most.  At the time I did not know that black ants bite too, but I found out later that they really do.

I watched the clouds roll by and listened to the small planes fly overhead. I often wondered where flew and how far.  As a young girl I didn't know much yet.   So wondering these things is normal.  

I claimed that tree as mine and nobody could have it; not even my siblings.

Soon I would hear the yell.  It must have stressed me out because I couldn't concentrate on anything else but her yell.

I found a little bit of peace under my tree and wished I never had to leave it.  I wonder what happened to it and if any other little girl ever found herself lying under my tree.

Those day were fond memories but only without hearing, "Heather! Mommy wants you!"

ONE GOOD MEMORY WITH MY MOMMY

 My mother wasn't the best mother.  she was bad and very evil most of her life.

To me she was kind and loving at times.  I was her special girl or at least she tried to make it seem that way.

Despite her bad ways, she surprised me sometimes when she spent a little bit of alone time with me .  Of course, I wasn't her only child but something about me made her act kindly towards me in a way that she was reaching out to show me she loved me.

I was 14 after we had lived in San Francisco for about a year since moving from Florida.

San Francisco was very different from the small town I grew up in in Florida.  I had never seen a big city and my mother often spoke of growing up in New York and telling us about tall buildings , escalators, buildings and shops everywhere. She talked about Central Park and how it was in the middle of the city.

San Francisco brought many exciting new adventures for all of us to experience.

As we began to get acquainted with and explore all the new places and things to see and do that we never imagined,  were amazed to find out that there was a huge park in the city called Golden Gate Park.  

We found buffalo roaming around a very large , fenced in area in the park.  That was hard to believe, but there they were just walking around living in the park.

There is Stow lake where people can rent pedal boats and row boats and take a row around the lake and see the turtles and ducks.

There is also a Japanese Tea Garden to explore the cherry blossoms and other plants and enjoy a refreshing cup of tea.

The memory I have is of the children's playground in the park where there was a Merry-Go Round that you had to buy a ticket to ride on. this was something new to my eyes. I knew since we were poor that I didn't ask my mother for a ride.  

Instead she surprised me when she bought a ticket for me.  My brothers were with us that day and they played at the playground and seemed content at their play.

My mother watched as I got on one of the horses and she told me to hang on tight to the strap. She said, "Grab the ring as you go around".  I didn't know what she was talking about so I looked around for a ring.  I saw what she meant when I noticed the other children reaching out to grab a ring off of a pole.

I don't know why they have rings to grab, I guess it was to have a fun ride and have some kind of a challenge. 

The little things she did with me probably made her a little bit happy.  She did seem happy that day just to see me on the Merry-Go-round.  I smiled and laughed as I rode and she waved each time I passed by her.  I waved back each time.

Just a little bit of happiness with my Mommy. A nice memory of her when we lived in San Francisco.